


I thought you said forever

by Ace_of_Hearts08



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Angst, Assassin AU, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-16
Updated: 2021-03-20
Packaged: 2021-03-24 15:41:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,223
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30074514
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ace_of_Hearts08/pseuds/Ace_of_Hearts08
Summary: The sequel to 'forever alone'Dream was gone. George needed to move on. But he couldn't. He felt so empty now. The person he had gotten out of bed for every morning was gone. He felt as though he had nothing to live for and felt it was just better to not...well live, but he made a promise and the person who he had promised had broken one of their own. And that one broken promise had torn George's world apart
Relationships: Clay | Dream/GeorgeNotFound (Video Blogging RPF)





	1. The stages of grief

|chapter 1|

George got across the border sure, he was safe and laying low at the moment yes, all his friends were safe of course. But that was months ago, and the one reason he got out of bed every morning was gone. The one person George loved more than anything was gone. He had left him, just like most of the other people in his life.  
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The sun crept lazily into George’s room. His apartment was a mess, he had barely had the energy to clean it, not that he spent much time in any other part of it but his room. He was in a small apartment in a busy town in the western kingdom. He was supposed to be laying low until chaos died down, there was still a sense of pandemonium even though it had been months since George had crossed the border. 

George didn’t plan on getting out of bed. His entire body hurt, especially his heart. He hadn’t eaten something or drank water in too long. George was withering away in the dusty apartment Sapnap had practically dragged him to about three months ago. Summer was fading and autumn winds were bringing in the cold. But George couldn’t feel it. He felt numb, but at the same time, all he felt was pain. He hated waking up in the morning. It brought him back to reality. The reality he never wanted to see again, the reality that had lured him into a false sense of security and then ripped everything away from him in an instant, with a small silver blade his entire world fell apart, that small silver blade was a seam ripper that went through and ripped apart the fabric of his life. It all fell apart at the seams.

George was nothing but a hollow ghost of who he was before. He had dark bags under his eyes despite the fact all he did was sleep. His ribs show through his skin from his lack of motivation to leave his bed. His skin was ghostly pale. He felt like he was sleepwalking but he didn’t care. He was in so much pain. He knew people said that a lot, but this was different, this was as if someone had taken a part of you and it was irreplaceable, or as if your heart had a hole in it that could only be filled by one specific thing but that thing was unobtainable. George wanted the pain to stop but he knew it would, no matter how much he cried the pain never stopped, no matter what his friends told him, it was endless pain. And George wasn’t sure how much longer he could do it. But he made a promise. Goerge promised he would live, no matter how much it hurt. But George didn’t feel like he was living, he felt as if he was just existing, and the thing that made him feel alive was gone. 

George hated to admit it but, 

He was forever alone.


	2. Selfish

|chapter 2|

George laid in bed just about all day but was only forced to leave when Sapnap showed up at his door demanding it. Sure Sapnap was grieving too, but he had a different way of coping, and someone to help him through it. George couldn’t cope, he didn’t even know where to start. He was missing something he couldn’t replace, he felt empty and didn’t even know where to start trying to repair himself. He didn’t even have words to describe what he felt.

no matter how hard Sapnap tried he felt he couldn’t get through to George. His eyes were empty and had lost the glint that made him look alive, he seemed so lifeless and it hurt to see one of his best friends like this. He was trying to be strong for George but it was getting harder and harder to conceal his feelings. He had lost someone too after all. But Karl was a great help, Sapnap couldn’t even explain how grateful he was for having Karl there with him. Karl was of course upset too but he had been there for Sapnap from the beginning, and Sapnp couldn’t have asked for a better person to help him through it. 

Sapnap pushed open the door to George’s apartment. 

“Hey, George? It’s Nick and Karl!” Sapnap called out into the dark house. 

He hadn’t expected to see anybody in the front rooms of the apartment. Just as he expected he was met with silence. Sapnap sighed sadly squeezing Karl’s hand. 

“I am going to go find him…I will be right back.” He said softly to Karl. Karl nodded giving a soft smile.

Nick walked off down the dim hallway knocking on the first door. 

“George, c’mon you need to eat something I know you haven't left bed yet today.” 

He heard some light shuffling from inside the room before the door opened revealing George. He looked incredibly frail, he needed to eat more, he needed to take care of himself but Sapnap knew that it would be some time before he would be able to get back on his feet. 

George gave him a weak smile hugging him half-heartedly. Sapnap smiled hugging back. 

“Go clean up and Karl and I will make some food ok?” Sapnap asked. 

George nodded disappearing down the hallway. Sapnap sighed walking back into the front of the apartment flicking on the lights. Karl was sitting on the couch in the living room flipping through a book he had brought. Sapnap crept up behind him wrapping his arms around his shoulders. Karl smiled softly, gripping one of Sapnap’s hands. 

“Does George even have any food here?” Sapnap said, chuckling. 

Karl sighed. “Didn’t we get food for him like two weeks ago?” Karl said, glancing over to the kitchen. 

“I think so...he probably barely ate any of it too.” Sapnap sighed. He wanted to help George but it was hard to help someone who seemed as if they didn’t want to help themselves. And George had every right to be upset of course, but he needed to try to live, if not for himself than for Dream because Sapnap knew that if Dream saw what George was doing to himself at that moment in time, it would break his heart, and George knew that too. 

George stepped under the scalding hot water coming out of the showerhead. He sighed, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He appreciated Sapnap and Karl coming to check in on him every once in a while but it just made him feel like a burden. He wanted to help himself more than anything but it was hard to get out of bed in the morning when you knew there was no one in the kitchen waiting for you. George felt alone. But he wanted to try and fix himself. 

George shuffled back down the hallway from his room and into the kitchen. He said a soft hello to Karl as he passed, going over to help Sapnap with whatever he was attempting to make. 

“Surprised you haven't burnt the entire building down yet,” George said leaning on the counter completely deadpan. 

Sapnap scoffed, “I know how to cook pasta.” George rolled his eyes smiling softly. 

“So how have you guys been?” George asked, sliding into a barstool at the counter. 

“Well, Karl and I have had some jobs over the last few weeks but we are practically freelancing jobs right now...ya know, treason and all,” Sapnap said, propping his elbows on the counter. 

George winced. His friends were both out of jobs because of him. He had fucked up a lot of people’s lives for no reason, they had not been obligated to help him in any way and now they were all struggling and it was his fault. 

George’s eyes traced the empty table in front of him, an awkward silence passing over the group. 

Sapnap should see George beating himself up inside. 

“George, it’s not your fault, seriously you need to stop blaming everything on yourself.” Sapnap sighed, putting a firm hand on George’s shoulder. 

“But that’s the thing! A lot of the shit that has happened is my fault! I am so fucking selfish I just had to keep walking around being an idiot! And maybe if I hadn’t done all of the shit I did he would still be here right now!” George said balling his fists.

“George-“ Sapnap started. 

“I just feel so stupid! I should have been thinking!” George continued. 

“George! Seriously! You are my best friend man but honestly, we lost someone too! You're Not the only person who is upset right now! Really! We are all at fault here! You have every right to be mad or upset but get out of your goddamn head!” Karl visibly winced behind George, Karl had become very sensitive to certain things as of late and Sapnap often had to make sure Karl was ok and all of the yelling was getting to him. 

George’s eyes started to water. He really felt like an idiot. He was selfish and in his head too much. He wasn't the only one grieving. George fled quickly from the kitchen back down the hall to his room slamming the door, which just added to Karl’s panic. 

Karl started breathing a bit irregularly, his eyes frantically darting around the room. His shoulders were tensing and he felt a bit suffocated. 

Sapnap a down the hall before rushing over to Karl. “Hey, shh, it’s okay, I am sorry we were yelling. I know you hate that...you are okay, it is just me Karl.” Sapnap wrapped his arms around the brunette stroking his hair lightly. 

Karl’s breathing slowed, he soon returned the hug, clinging tightly to Sapnap and burying his face in the taller’s chest.   
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George pressed his back firmly against the cold wood door sliding down to the floor and putting his head in his hands. 

He really was selfish.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this is literally all I have pre written so you might not together another chapter fro a day or two sry my writing has bee slow lately :’]


	3. Suffocation

|chapter 3|

George had made a promise. That was what he kept reminding himself as he sat on the floor of his dark room. He couldn’t bear the weight of the world alone like this. It was too much. But he made a promise, and he was trying so hard to keep it. 

“Why did you have to leave me…” George sobbed quietly into his hands as he sat in the dark.   
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Karl had fallen asleep on Sapnap’s chest on the couch in George’s apartment. Sapnap sighed lightly as he rubbed small circles on Karl’s back, listening to him breathe softly. George wasn’t okay. He knew that, but he didn’t know how to help. George felt the world was after him, and Sapnap couldn’t make him realize he wasn’t alone, George had to figure that out for himself. But Sapnap could be there for George. George needed time though, it would still be a while before George could start moving forward. He was still trapped in the moment the love of his life died. And Sapnap couldn’t imagine what that was like, and frankly, he didn’t want to. He had lost someone too. And George was in his head too much to realize how upset everyone else was. But if Sapnap lost Karl he would most definitely be inside his head a lot, refusing the help of his friends because he felt nothing could ease the pain. Sapnap had lost people before but not like this.   
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George heard a soft knock on the door. 

“George….please open up…” It was Karl, George hesitantly stood up opening the door.

George’s face was still stained with tears and his hair was quite messy from having run his hands through it several times. 

Karl sighed softly pulling him into a hug. 

“George, you need to let us help you...but we can’t do that if you don’t want to help yourself. You aren’t alone George, we are here for you, I know you feel alone but you aren’t...so please just let us help you, if not for yourself then for him, please?” Karl said softly. He knew just how George felt, he had lost a close friend only a few months before he met Sapnap, and Sapnap found out pretty quickly since Karl seemed very quiet most of the time. 

George wanted to make an effort, but he felt as if he was being suffocated, everything he had been feeling over the last few weeks was suffocating him. He wanted to scream until his throat hurt, he wanted to scream until the pain went away. 

But he couldn’t wake up his neighbors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Sorry for disappearing I’m not dead just busy, but I am back with new ideas! And this is not going to be a super long fic (i think) so I hope you guys like this :] anyways sorry again for disappearing think I might post 1-2 more chapters tonight but it depends! Idk :]
> 
> <3


	4. Burdens

|chapter 4|

George spent the next few weeks trying to get better. Every little thing he did still hurt though, everything he saw or heard, or smelled reminded him of Dream, and it all hurt. 

Sapnap and Karl continued their visits, close to every two weeks. Karl seemed quiet and Sapnap was a bit worried about him but he didn’t want to pry.  
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George sighed as the sun streamed in through his open curtains. Sapnap and Karl were visiting again today so he wanted to look at least partially preventable. 

George contemplated his life choices a moment before rolling out of bed. And hastily tidying up his room before moving on to the rest of his apartment. He made an effort to try and eat something even though he still felt sick anytime he tried to eat. He always felt on the verge of tears and felt as if the wind changed directions it would make the small amount of improvement he had made completely crumble. 

George managed to clean up most of his apartment and take a shower before Sapnap and Karl arrived. George laid sprawled out on the couch in his living room trying to read a book, he did like books but he couldn’t seem to get lost in the pages of a book like he used to. He sighed heaving himself up from the couch and slid the book back into place on the old bookshelf.

George heard a knock on the door of his apartment. George quickly walked over to the door swinging it open. 

“Oh! Hey!” Sapnap said, smiling. 

“Hi, how was the trip over?” George said stepping aside and letting the pair in. 

Karl forced a smile as he passed George. 

“Not bad, storm on the way though, it is going to get cold,” Sapnap said setting his things down in the spare room and walking back into the front rooms. Karl had sat down on the couch pulling his knees to his chest. George could tell Karl was off, but he wasn’t sure why. 

Sapnap walked into the kitchen pulling out a few pots and pans to cook with. Karl flinched at the noise of the metal colliding. George slid up next to Sapnap sending a slightly confused glance towards Sapnap. Sapnap’s expression turned slightly pained. George sighed lightly ushering Sapnap out of the kitchen so George could cook. 

“He is not ok Nick, talk to him,” George said softly to Sapnap. 

Sapnap nodded slightly, sighing and walking over to Karl. Sapnap put a gentle hand on Karl's back saying something inaudible to George. Karl nodded lightly in response uncoiling from his curled up position and stood up slipping his hand into Sapnaps as they walked down the hall. 

|Sapnap/Karl POV| 

Sapnap shut the door to the guest room lightly, turning to Karl. 

“Karl….you haven’t been yourself lately,” Sapnap said in a gentle tone.

“I am worried about you….I want you to feel like you can talk to me about things that are bothering you.” Sapnap cupped Karl’s cheek with his hand lightly, Karl leaned into the gesture. 

Karl wanted to tell Sapnap what was wrong, he wanted to tell him everything, he wanted to have Sapnap wrap his arms and him and tell him everything was going to be fine. Karl wanted that more than anything, but Sapnap had just lost one of his best friends and Karl didn’t want to add to the pain that Sapnap was already feeling. 

“Y-you are already going through so much right now…” Karl’s voice cracked,

“I just don’t want you to worry about me right now...Nick, you lost someone really important to you, I don’t want to add to the burden….” Karl said softly brushing his fingers over Sapnap’s knuckles. 

Sapnap’s brow furrowed, “Karl is that what you think?” Sapnap’s voice was just above a whisper. 

Karl shrunk away from the question, but sapnap pushed forward. “Is that, really what you think?” Karl saw something in Sapnap’s eyes, but it wasn’t pitying. It was absolute sorrow. 

“Don’t act like it’s not true,” Karl said stepping away from Sapnap, breaking their hands apart. Karl glared at the ground as he felt Sapnap’s eyes search him. 

Sapnap wanted to cry, the person he loved most felt as though they were a burden to him. 

“Do I make you feel like you are a burden to me?” Sapnap’s voice broke as he spoke. 

Karl’s gaze flashed up quickly, filling with fear and guilt. 

“No no no no no, Nick, it isn’t you, I just….I am scared I am and you aren’t telling me…I am scared you don’t want me…” Karl couldn’t meet Sapnap’s eyes. 

Sapnap let a few tears slide down his face. He quickly wrapped Karl in a tight embrace burying his face in Karl’s shoulder. 

“K-Karl, I love you more than anything, you have made this all so much easier to get through, and you not being okay, and not feeling like you can tell me, or are good enough for me….it hurts, Karl I love you, please you have to understand that you aren’t a burden, you are the only reason I have made it through these last few months.” Sapnap clung tightly to Karl. 

Karl let a few tears slip from his eyes as he wrapped his arms around Sapnap returning the hug. Sapnap lifted his head from Karl’s shoulder pressing his forehead lightly against Karl’s. 

Karl let his eyes flutter shut a moment as he pressed a soft kiss on Sapnap’s lips. 

“I love you too…” he whispered. 

Karl pulled Sapnap a bit closer to him resting his head on the taller male’s chest. 

“C-can we talk in a bit?” Karl asked quietly. 

“Whenever you are ready,” Sapnap said squeezing Karl tighter. 

Karl giggled. “Ok, I want to go see what George made. I am hungry.” Karl said, wiggling out from Sapnap’s tight embrace. 

“Noooo come back, I want more cuddles.” Sapnap pouted. 

Karl giggles running from the room and into the kitchen.

“George help!” Karl said giggling. 

He hid behind George as Sapnap came into the room. 

Sapnap laughed as George mercilessly stepped aside allowing Sapnap to reach Karl. Sapnap pulled Karl into another hug picking him up and sitting down on the couch in the living room with Karl in his lap. Karl squirmed for a moment before ultimately giving up and resting his head on Sapnap’s chest. 

George watched from the kitchen, a sad smile on his face and an ache in his heart. 

He really did want to scream until his throat hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow ok so there isn’t going to be a lot of Karlnap after this point because uh- you will see but shit is about to pick up and I am v exited. But i am not sure when I am going to be posting the next chapter because I have a huge project due in like 4 days and I am less than 1/4 of the way through so- procrastination pog (PROCRASTINATION IS NOT POG GO DO YOUR FUCKING WORK BRO) ok thanks for reading <3

**Author's Note:**

> Wow i mean- here we are back at it again- i am v excited ab this and I dont have much to say but you know i am ready for this and you guys are most definetly not :] 
> 
> <3


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